To Be or.. TO KILL?

Tenicia was mad that her dim-witted horny Bulgarian boyfriend had left her with no one to fuck while she watches I Love Lucy marathons. Her clitoris ached like a hoo on a ham sandwich.

"Bastard," she said. "I hope Buddha rapes his sorry Bulgarian ass."

Meanwhile, Tenicia's boyfriend was up in heaven sipping Kool-Aid from martini glasses and eating vegan pizza with his homeboys.

"So Jesus," said the beaver. "I didn't know up were from Texas."

"Yes my child," he replied. "Few people realize I am also a gay black Jewish Communist who likes Liza Minelli, either."

"You like Liza Minelli?" asked The Enlightened One. "You fag!"

Back at home, Tenicia decided to go to Heaven herself. At the precise moment Buddha got up to get more Kool-Aid, she drowned herself in the murky Albany swamps.

Suddenly she appeared in fornt of the beaver and his homeboys.

"BITCH!" screamed the beaver. "I thought I tooks care of you kind!"

Tenicia took the necklace around Buddha's neck. "Not... for... long!"

TO BE CONTINUED...  ¶ 5/14/2004 06:31:00 PM